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♠ Vampire
Pure-blood
Name: David ECK
School: Republic Polytechnic;
Year 2(going on year 3 );
IG: Red Cross IG
,
Loves: Vampire knight anime;
Shopping;
facebook game especially pet society;
Listen to songs;
hang out with friends
[:
♠ Thirst for
your blood
I wana learn how to play guitar;
want to buy guitar;
PSP;
new handphone(Iphone);
know god more;
lastly.... I think I have been deprived of a lot of things hehe
Hehe ,well i m writing this post on a early morn of 5 am cos i find i have the environment to self reflect about myself .The main goals for me now is 1)Red Cross 2)Cg 3)SYCO .However,I have been self asking myself for the pass hour the most basic question of everything n even direct to the main goals of the current phase of my life.Why did i go Cg?isn't that a simple question i ask myself however it is so hard to answer !well ,i can come up with 101 reason however i dun tink any of them are my true feelings !Why did i go cg when i had to neglect another goal of my life ,SYCO?why must i have to make a choice between the 2 when i wana accomplish two things at one time?reason being i wan go cg is because ,they make me feel family warmth something i m backlusted of 10 years i thought i have become si xin to family love as i dont believe anymore but this cg make me realise somewhere outside even if the person is nt related to u by blood also can provide u family love.Also i never meet before anyone so earnest with no bad motive saving n leading me away from satan mouth that torture me for so long.Well,it is over .However ,my goal in my life have to interfere with my relationship wif papa ?why it is constantly getting into the way ?shld i give it up ?i feel like giving both up !to save myself from this disease that will relapse anytime .Sometimes ,I juz hate myself cos i always twists the truth and always hiding my true feelings away from people !These always result in misunderstanding and cause disharmony among people when will I be able to learn ?My current idea is that I might as well quit SYCO since i wana serve god thats my purpose in gg water baptism isn't it if nt i mind as well backslide before that ,and i feel that since I am halfway there aldy n i have develop my relationship with papa aldy i cant just severed it now because of my goal which i maynt even use in heaven to praise god right?Also i feel that my bonding with erhu is getting weaker n weaker i dunno it is even meant for me?shld i juz quit it nw to serve god wholeheartedly n nt be distracted by anything?i dunno arghhh 心烦！the only thing i noe nw is papa i love you very much what can i do to save me from thing ?i m getting migrain from it again!papa jiu jiu wo!!Papa,why are u giving me such a test ?why r u letting me pass the audition in the 1st place?are u testing my faithfulness or my stamina in withstanding blows?what shld i do?i Dunoo!how i wish to be a kid like kid again where i can soar freely in the air.......